Thoughts of the Cool
Wrapped in a chocolate package. Indulge.
Once you realize that most people in college are full of shit your life will improve significantly
#Fact.
My future children will probably look something like this <3
(Source: curlskinksandcoils, via eyesarethewindowstothesoul)
(via superwomansounds)
(Source: michellehuxtable, via superwomansounds)
“Don’t you know that slavery was outlawed?”
“No,” the guard said, “you’re wrong. Slavery was outlawed with the exception of prisons. Slavery is legal in prisons.”
I looked it up and sure enough, she was right. The Thirteenth Amendment to the Constitution says:“Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction.”
Well, that explained a lot of things. That explained why jails and prisons all over the country are filled to the brim with Black and Third World people, why so many Black people can’t find a job on the streets and are forced to survive the best way they know how. Once you’re in prison, there are plenty of jobs, and, if you don’t want to work, they beat you up and throw you in a hole. If every state had to pay workers to do the jobs prisoners are forced to do, the salaries would amount to billions… Prisons are a profitable business. They are a way of legally perpetuating slavery. In every state more and more prisons are being built and even more are on the drawing board. Who are they for? They certainly aren’t planning to put white people in them. Prisons are part of this government’s genocidal war against Black and Third World people.
I wonder do people realize how amazing the human heart and mind are. I can look at a picture of my boyfriend, which comes from the eye that sends signals to the mind and my mood changes then every memory I have with him comes to the forefront and I smile and my heart skips a beat. This is love.
I need Janelle Monae to be my best friend, or mentor.
(Source: antiartpop, via eyesarethewindowstothesoul)
Goes with my post about long distance =)
Every time I see this, I have to stop and appreciate the fineness of it all.
(Source: thethingsyouare, via hyawakening)
Long Distance Relationship - Tips for the brave
I was inspired today to write this post. Purely out of thinking about another friend/friends who are and have embarked on this journey already. One thing about the heart that I’ve realized, is that it does not care where it falls in love, even if the time you’ve spent/are spending with that person is limited. For many, the idea of breaking things off before they get too deep is a choice, or they choose to maintain it. In the latter situation sometimes either one or both are unable to keep the maintenance and the relationship suffers. From my own personal experience I’ve been in both a long distance relationship that did not work and another that has gone on for almost a year this upcoming May— mostly learning from the first one as a guide to the second. As I see a few of my friends, both Facebook and real life, embark on this journey with their newfound or old loves, I figured I would share some of the things that has kept my relationship going, and would love any suggestions if people have them.
1. Communication is ABSOLUTELY key and by every means. That’s including text, phone calls, Skype, letters, emails, packages, facebook posts, utilize them all! The above that I have mentioned are each and every way that my boyfriend and I have communicated with one another. What people fail to realize in any relationship is that even if you are 2 feet away from one another communication is still important. I have seen couples that know little about their partners goals and aspirations or simply are just horrible communicators. Can you hold conversations that are more than arguments? It helps to keep the information flowing and new and exciting ways of seeing each other. Which leads me to post #2.
2. Save money, long distance is expensive. The reason I say this is because it is really difficult to be in this relationship and go cold turkey without seeing your lover at all. While I’m in Los Angeles and my boyfriend in D.C. I have seen him on 4 occasions and met his parents in-between. Luckily, one of those flights was to Las Vegas but DC ranged from $300-$500 trips. Now, multiply that by 3, a minimum of $900 was spent in traveling and I spent at least 5 days to a week to enjoy my time with him. For those who are able to skip the flight and make driving trips from the Bay to Los Angeles or NY to DC that’s still a Megabus trip and what many people don’t quantify as money, but time being spent as well.
3. Be honest! This is probably one of the most important factors to me. There is nothing worse in any relationship, whether it be with a friend or a partner, than to have pockets of lies throughout. Lay everything out IN THE BEGINNING. I mean it, my boyfriend knew I was going back to Los Angeles, I had already done the long distance a year before and didn’t want to go through the heartache again, and I was hesitant. He was very reassuring that this could work because it it something that we both wanted, we fell for each other pretty fast and saw that we could be with one another as time progressed. From our conversations about religion, friendships, race, politics, love and the distance itself we have communicated, honestly, to one another our views and perspectives, which has made (guessing what he/she is thinking, obsolete).
4. If you can see yourself with someone else, don’t do it. If you are able to envision yourself with someone else while you are in this relationship, then this is a tell-tale sign that you should probably reconsider the relationship in the first place. Long distance puts a hamper on relationships that being with one another fills, you’re in the physical presence of someone, there is contact. Now, when you take away your boyfriend or girlfriend and you find yourself liking someone else or lowering your inhibitions for someone else then you need to reconsider.
5. Be comfortable with yourself. If you are unable to be in a relationship or better yet, unable to be by yourself because you need someone, then a long distance relationship is going to be extremely difficult. One thing about my boyfriend and I is that we are comfortable with being ourselves, we know who we are, what goals we have and that they align with one another. However, our relationship is complimentary, we both bring something significant that when were together it’s a great bond. I am not saying get rid of every insecurity that you may have because were human and we have them, but be comfortable so that they do not interfere with your distance. You also know yourself the best, if you know that you’re unable to be the boyfriend or girlfriend that your partner wants, then you should let that be known. Which last but not least, leads me into my final point.
6. Be trusting. The biggest wrench in relationships that are in the same space is trust. Many people do not trust that their partner will be faithful or honest, or have more doubts than beliefs in their character. That is a HUGE insecurity that tends to hamper on a long distance relationship because of the “I don’t know” factor. I connect both five and six because if you are not comfortable with yourself, you will not be comfortable alone and may possibly need someone. That idea soon turns into a lack of trust because you know what you would do, and as the mind can become the devil’s playground, place that onto your partner. However, in order for these problems and issues to come full circle just make sure that you always remember number 1: communication. For without it, it will be difficult to maintain this relationship and only add a strain to something that brings you happiness — being with the one you love.
